I've been MIA

Honestly, I have not written in awhile because I had a huge setback this weekend. But this whole week I have been good. Yesterday I was so proud of myself...I took the girls to the mall and I even bought C*Dance a cookie and I did not get anything but a water. Today I hit the gym extra hard. To be honest...I am not recording it down as a official but today i checks ed the scale (OCD much?!) and I was down to 244lbs! I am not officially weighing in until July 1st so i should just quit checking but still...I CAN NOT wait until I hit 230-something..when did I ever think I would have to say that?! Anyway...no negativity right?! GO ME!

Today was a loss but you gotta live

Today was a loss, I ate so much stuff...not really "bad" except some cupcakes but still...too much food. This weekend will be rough too as C*Dance turns 3 tomorrow so we have festivities this weekend. Anyway, I am making daily changes so I am taking one day at a time. So, slap me on my wrist I was bad today!

My cheat meal on Wednesday?

No way! I just had an amazing meal...I do not even think it was good for me (but it was!)! I had a quesadilla (cheese, lofat ranch, chicken and lettuce) and a side salad and for dessert I ate a couple chunks of watermelon. This wasn't exactly a "clean" meal but after 3 hours of erands and shopping (including the bank) with the girls it was some nice comfort food. :) I did steal a bite of C*Dance's cheeseburger but hey, at least I did not have my own! Go me and back to the gym tomorrow!

Have will!

Today I am taking the girls to the mall. C*Dance has a birthday party on Friday and I have to get some things for it. However, those things to not include Auntie Annes pretzels/cookies and Cinnabun (or whatever else I may find creeping through the mall!). So I'm, writing this before I go to say hey, don't do it! Eat lunch when you get home and have some yummy watermelon if you want something sweet! Maybe we'll do Subway today, that is healthy. Anyway, off we go...well, with two kids I mean off we go in 1 1/2 hours. :)

Have your cake and eat it too

Can you please tell me why I was so motivated (still am) to not eat anything unhealthy but yet as soon as I finish my super healthy lunch (tuna wrap, tortilla chips and salsa) I ate 3 big bites of C*dance's birthday cake! Grrr....I am upset with myself. But it is not the end of the world and I only had 3 bites (story of my life). Ok...Rule number 2# Before I dive into something I know is not good for me I must consult with my blog! After writing about it, if I decide it's ok then I'll partake.

All these numbers

All I have right now is a before pic but I am so ready to have a) an after pic and b) at least a midway pic. Lord please, I need another pic other than the ones I took today because trust me I'm ready to not see those bad boys again. Here are the stats:

height: 5'10

weight: 247

pants size: 18/20

shirt size: 18/20 (XXL)

bra size: 40D

I'm not going to sit and beat myself up for how incredibly horrible I look in this picture because I'm doing the things I need to do now to change it. So...I'm a beautiful person on the inside and I want that to show through to others. Everyone has areas in the physical, mental, spiritual and relationship lives that need work and I am NO different. But it is time I start being about the change instead of talking about the change or...better yet, acting like I have already changed!

You can do it!

Happy New Year!!

So I did it, "today is my day, I'm offf to great places I'm off and away!" (Dr. Suess btw).
June 1, 2010 :)I went to the gym and did 40 minutes of cardio. It was a crazy busy morning and C*Dance was NOT helping AT ALL! The fact that I made it at all is amazing. I also did 50 crunches on the ab machine thing they have. Anyway, here's to a great year and this journey as I take this road to bikiniville. It'sonly day one (and SUPER hot out) so the desire for tons of food is not there anyway right now. I have eggs boiling so I can make a tuna salad wrap. So, day 1 of my year has been off to a great start gym and nutrition wise. Now if I can get this almost 3 year old to have some home training we would be in buisness. :) Which reminds me: Rule number 1# lose the negativity.